Complaint from Simon

complaint (please broadcast to all women)

SIMON IS SICK OF THE FOLLOWING TWO CONVERSATIONS THAT OCCUR ON NEARLY
EVERY DATE

Simon: Well, actually I grew up in England.
Girl: Oh? Really? Did you have an accent?
Simon: Yes, but, as you can tell, it is gone.
Girl: That is so unfortunate. English accents are SO sexy.
Simon: Ah, yes, so I've been told.
Girl: Can you do an English accent for me now?
Simon: No.
Girl: English accents are SO sexy.

Girl: The stars are so pretty tonight.
Simon: Yes, they are.
Girl: Tell me about the constellations.
Simon: Well, actually, I do mostly theoretical things, there's a lot of
math.
Girl: But you must know the constellations.
Simon: Actually, well, um, I don't.
Girl: How can you be an astronomer and not know the constellations?
Simon: Well, you see, the constellations actually have no scientific...
ah, what's the use. [makes up facts about made up constellations


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